80's Hair Bands, Mohawks, and Dysfunctional Adults Mentoring Dysfunctional Teenagers: 3 Reasons Why I Love Wednesday Night...

I am in love.

Not ovary tingling love. Good heavens, I've been married for going on 14 years. The King and I are in this forever.

No, it's the kind where you become so obsessed you can't think about anything else. The kind of love where the object of your affection is almost a drug. Like an addict, you would do just about anything for a hit. You stalk it on the web and google everyday hoping some new photo or juicy video has been leaked onto the world wide web. When you find such a treasure you look/watch it over and over and over. You can't get enough.

I am in love with Glee.

You know a show is not just good but remarkable when you love, or love-to-hate every single character on it. Each is tragically flawed, but that only makes them perfect caricatures of humanity as a whole. For example:

*Mr. Shuester (aka Mr. Shue or Will): The guy who forgoes wealth and prestige to take the "honorable" road of teaching and mentoring but cannot see the truth staring him in the face- that his lazy, self-indulged has been cheerleader of a wife is faking her pregnancy and he's really in love with the OCD riddled, doe eyed school counselor.

*Rachel Berry: Insanely talented and pretty in a quirky, Barbara Streisand kind of way, but obnoxious to the point that she deserves all the slushies thrown in her face. She redefines Diva to a point that Mariah Carey and Celine almost look humble. And yet, I'm rooting for her and Finn and I love that her most selfless and vulnerable moments are when she is with him.

*Finn: I bet his mother called him Man Child when he was growing up too. He's is lanky, horribly uncoordinated and dumb as a brick but he is also lovable and endearing- kind of like a puppy. When he told Quinn he wanted to name their daughter Drizzle I wanted to both pat his head patronizingly and slap him silly for being so dumb that he actually thought he could get his girlfriend preggers through, well, watch the show. I love that his voice is raw and untrained and getting better every week.

*Quinn: Shame on you girl. Preggo by your boyfriend's BFF, and then you have the nerve to call your baby daddy a "Lima Loser" when he offers to step up and take responsibility. It's nice to see the snobby, cruel Cheerio slip down the social ladder a few notches, but her social demise is not as satisfactory as you'd hope when you see her crying in despair over the reality of being a teenage mother-to-be and having to face the disappointment of her family and the humiliation of the entire student body knowing that the Celibacy Club Pres. has to turn in her chastity belt.

*Sue Sylvester: Crass, racist, abusive, anti everything under the sun that smells remotely like it came from a democrat- the perfect villain. She's so good at being bad that she might just be the reason why "witch" lost the w and got replaced with that other letter. The one after A.

*Emma: As a fellow germophobe, I feel her pain every time she wipes down a door handle before touching it or becomes panicked when someone touches her food. Her crush on Will is sweet, but not sickeningly sick- more like diabetic approved sweet. My heart broke for her when she accepted Ken's proposal, but I cant help but want to see her pick up his sweaty and sporadically washed John Stockton gym shorts off their bedroom floor while wearing a gas mask and rubber gloves.

*Puck: You've gotta love a guy who can rock a Mohawk while expressing his sensitive side by serenading the local cougars who employ him to clean their pools, and um, other things. At first I really hated him for his relentless persecution of the music geeks- mostly because I was one back in high school and I still haven't really accepted the fact that I always have been and forever will be uncool. But when he revealed that he thought moms are hot he had a fan for life. We are hot, right moms? Sure we've given our youthful bodies away to pregnancies, childbirth and never having a free moment to ourselves but man, we can work it! You just go ahead an appreciate the beauty that is a mother with stretch marks and saggy boobs Puck.

I could go on and on, as I have failed to touch the other great characters in this comedy of error, but the hour is late and the eyes grow weary. Let me then give a special honorable mention to Kurt, Tina and Ken for being unique and always leaving me wanting more, and to Wheels and Mercedes for killer pipes. I could listen to "Bust a Window" over and over and over.

Speaking of music, have I mentioned that the Glee songs are AMAZING!!! I love the reworks of great classics and modern music, but my favorite has to be the mashup of Bon Jovi and Usher from 2 weeks ago. I've had a serious thing for Jon Bon Jovi since Middle School, and my Glee boys did him proud. We have purchased every available Glee song on iTunes and there is rarely a family car ride where we don't have one of their songs pumping.

So I guess we all have a crush on Glee in a way. Fox can almost sing Journey's "Don't Stop Believe" in tune, and the Man Child jumps in on the "da, da, da, da da"'s with energy, a rhythmic head bob and a few great booty shakes from his car seat. Family bonding moments are important you know.

I heard a rumor the other day that the Glee cast might go on tour this summer. If it's true, be still my heart. Oh, and you'd better invest in some really good security. I've never been a stalker before but for Glee I might just become a roadie.