Proud Parenting Moments....

Man Child: "No go to bed. I watch Earl" (as in My Name Is Earl, a totally appropriate show for a 3 year old). New words he's bound to pick up from tonight's episode: douche bag, butthole, tongue down a stripper's throat, dumb@$$.....

Man Child: "Shut up dad"- earlier today it was "Shut up Fox". If he's going to be disrespectful and inappropriate at least he's sticking to his own gender.

(Note to The King, because you're the one who allows him to watch it: absolutely no more Earl for MC, no matter how nicely he sits through it without saying a word)
TQ: "Bubble wrap is cheap, therapy is expensive. You choose"

Man CHild: "Thank you for Poppa, Gama, Clifford (he omits 'The Big Red Dog', and he's right to; the name is redundant. It's pretty obvious Clifford is big, red, and a dog)". MC's standard meal and evening prayer. Apparently these are the only 3 things he loves.

The King: "We DO NOT pee in a garbage can or any other container including empty soda bottles just because you don't want to stop playing Rock Band."

Loma: "Okay, who plugged mom and dad's toilet AGAIN???"

Fox is conspicuously absent from the list (well, except for one entry in which the culprit was not named but let's just say it wasn't a girl and it wasn't the boy who still wears diapers), mostly because he has spent the last 3 days sick in bed with a stomach bug. The poor kid catches everything.

So that he doesn't feel left out I think I'll mention that he has vomited on the floor twice.

No man is left behind in this house.

Anyone Remember Three Men and a Baby??

Boy in the corner behind the curtains: Urban legend or "bring your kid to work then misplace them" day on the set?

I have to admit, when I was a wee tween and the mysterious "ghost boy" was pointed out to me I freaked out a little. They had to notice the boy when shooting- he was SO obvious. There was no reasonable explanation for how the director, producers, camera men, lighting dudes, food service people, editors, and screeners missed the blatantly out-of-place extra in the scene.

He had to be a phantom. A phantom that haunted Tom Selleck. Because he hated his mustache.

At least I thought so until today, over 20 years since the 3M&AB ghost first encited an entire week worth of night terrors (yes, I'm a bit of a wuss. Watcher in the Woods is still the scariest movie I've ever seen).

Today, we downloaded our pictures from Thanksgiving at The Grand America. The King really wanted to take some pictures of the kids and I in their beautiful hallway. The boys wouldn't cooperate but TQ and I were totally up for an impromptu photo shoot. Upon viewing the results, I realised that we had NO IDEA where The Man CHild was for the 10 minutes we were posing, and that I should feel really blessed that he entertained himself hiding in the 15' Parisian curtains that are worth more than my car rather than running up and down the hall screaming like the exorcist.



A new urban legend is born.

Warning: If You Have No Sense of Humor Concerning Max Hall's Tirade Stop Reading Now

My brother and fellow Ute alumnus sent me the following email on Saturday and I've been itching all weekend to post it. Unfortunately a certain SOMEONE (no names here- I hate ratting people out, but by someone I might just mean a certain 5'4" twelve year old with brown hair who wears infinitely nicer clothes than her mother- who incidentally just so happens to have the patience and forgiving heart of a saint!!) tried to access my google account and got my password all messed up so that I had to wait until TODAY. Hopefully it is worth the wait:



SALT LAKE CITY, UT - In response to BYU quarterback Max Hall's recent statements, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has adopted an amendment to its Thirteenth Article of Faith. The revised declaration now reads, in pertinent part, "We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men except those affiliated with the University of Utah , its football team, or fans thereof."

Additionally, LDS Church spokesman LaVerne Christiansen stated that General Authorities who had received academic degrees from the University of Utah would be immediately granted emeritus status and removed from their callings. "Except for President Monson," Christiansen explained, "because he repented of his [University of] Utah Bachelor's Degree by getting an MBA from the Lord's One True University ."

In related news, church scholars engaged in the Joseph Smith Papers Project have reported that they have recently discovered Smith's personal notes regarding the "inspired" translation of Matthew 5:44. "The King James Version has Christ telling his disciples to 'love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you,' which is all very good," said Project Editor F. Merrill Baker, Jr., "but the [newly discovered] Prophet's translation includes a caveat, making it clear that the Lord's pronouncement doesn't apply to the Utes."

"It's marvelous," continued Baker, who holds a doctorate in archival archaeology from Brigham Young University, "and it reveals that even though the University of Utah wasn't founded until 1850--more than five years after his death--Joseph Smith knew by the spirit of prophecy and inspiration that its football fans would spill their beer on BYU fans."

Just in case you didn't follow the admonition in my title and are now super offended and ready to turn me into my local church leaders for apostasy, might I remind you that THIS IS FAKE. You can't find it in the SL Tribune or the U's student newspaper, so don't even try. Besides, it won't work; I happen to know that my Bishop isn't a BYU fan.

Church is true people.

So How Exactly Does Kelly Kepalski Fit Into All This???

Did anyone else watching the Tuesday night premiere of "Scrubs" Medical School" have a deja vu flashback to "Saved By The Bell: The College Years"?????

Just asking.

Never mind. Turk and JD have way to much guy love going on to ever be likened to the rivals/sometimes friends Zach and AC Slater.

Crazy Much????

In the last 24 hours I have painted my half bathroom a total of 4 different colors: Bright green, brown green, yellow, and finally gray-green.

I have serious issues.

But 4 gallons of semi gloss later, the bathroom looks fabutastic. I have to remind myself that it's only a guest bath and as we are unloved and unvisited (hint hint) it rarely gets used except by the 6-10 year old piano students who occasionally consumed too much water in their "after school but before lessons" snack.

Oh well, it sure does look purdy.

I'm Trying To Be Mature About This.......

Oh, did you hear that BYU beat Utah on a "last play of the game" TD in overtime on Saturday?

Nail biter much???

Yeah, that's all I have to say about that.

Oh, but I must address Max Hall's post game comments:

#1- Dude, you need to move on with your life. I am truly sorry that your family was persecuted at the game. But blame the few individuals who acted like classless bums, not the whole university and half of Utah's population.

#2- Both BYU and Utah fans need to get a life. If your entire year is centered around this one rivalry game you really need to get out more. Or find another team to follow so that your attention is divided and life is more balanced.

#3- I love the University of Utah. I love the people, the teachers, the campus, the environment and culture......I could go on and on. I went to BYU for 2 years before transferring to the U. While BYU was a great school with wonderful programs and people, it never felt like home. From the moment I walked onto President's Circle at the U and immediately fell in love with the architectrue and history of the buildings I knew I was where I belonged. My daughter spent the first years of her life living in U married student housing, attending U preschool and spending almost every Friday night at a football or basketball game. In the much villified student section I might add. I think that's why she's such a fan now- she identifies with the school and culture as much as The King and I do. Our "U" years are a vital past of our history as a family. In the best days of my life, the day my husband and I both graduated from the U ranks only behind our wedding day and the births of our children. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my Univeristy of Utah

A Uath Man Am I!

Ahhh, the post holiday depression settles in.

I love Thanksgiving weekend. I think I love it more than Christmas.

I love that my kids are home, my hubby is home, and no piano lessons for 3 days.

It's a beautiful thing.

This year we decided to break out on our own for the first time in the almost 14 years we've been married. We would have done it sooner, but the problem was that I hate to cook and I hate most Thanksgiving foods. Hence, going to the fam or the fam-in-laws made much more sense than eating pb &j at home and calling it a holiday.

But this year we decided to take that bull by the horn and venture out on our own.

All the way to the Grand America Thanksgiving buffet in Salt Lake.

I won't tell you how much it cost. You might die. I almost did.

But it was worth every penny because (A) I didn't have to cook and so (B) I didn't have to touch raw meat and (C) the kids got to eat whatever they wanted and as much as they wanted until they were so full their little tummies almost burst. (Which we warned them before hand that they MUST eat until they wanted to die to validate the $$$$ that was being spent). Their plates were filled with the traditional Thanksgiving foods, but also included waffles, crepes, personalized omlets, salads, cheese, chocolate covered strawberries, parfaits, cream puffs shaped like turkeys, candy, oh I could go on and on. If you've never been to a buffet at The Grand you must go at least once before you die. They do the same spread on Easter and Mother'd Day but as those are Sunday holidays we've never been.

It was amazing.

Some might say that's not a "real" Thanksgiving, but all I say say in reply is that the kids didn't fight once, they ate eveything in sight, and they'll always remember the year we went to the Grand for Thanksgiving. I'm not sure what we'll do next year. Maybe we'll hit the buffet again, but we're leaning towards going out of town. Who knows. All I know is that I want it to be special and different, kind of like us.