When the kids are away..............

I really think that you can define a person's personality by the kind of movies they watch when they are all alone. For instance, I have had the VERY rare occasion to be at home by myself for the last four glorious hours. I cannot even remember the last time I didn't have at least one person clamoring for my attention. I should probably feel really guilty right now, because the Fox complained of a stomach ache all throughout church, but there was no way I was giving up my "me" time so I told him that he was probably just hungry from Fast Sunday and it would go away at Grandma Cella's house. I haven't had any calls telling me he's vomited exorcist style all over the floor so I figure all's well.

Planning this afternoon has been foremost in my mind ever since The King told me a few weeks ago that his parents were holding their annual super bowl fiesta. Now, I really love me some U of U football, but since there's no equivalent rivalry to that of BYU vs. Utah fans in the NFL football, it's really not worth my time to even care. The Holy war is just that, holy, and it cannot be compared to the trivial secular rivalries of colts vs. bears, or patriots vs....someone else, I really don't know many teams. Those are football teams, right?? So when he said he'd take the kids and I could stay home and have some time to myself, I vacillated between outright weeping and breaking into a happy dance to shame all other happy dances (I picked the weeping, and since I've previously admitted to my bladder control issues it should be pretty obvious why I went with THAT choice).

On Friday night I made a double batch of my knock-off Zupas Wisconsin cauliflower soup (yes mom, Amanda, Rebekah....and anyone else who is dying of shock right now, I cooked) so that I could have it for Freedom Bowl 2009 (it's the holiday I created for this special day, and all "super bowls" hereafter will be renamed as such). I stocked up on hot tamales, junior mints, and my very favorite 94% fat free popcorn. Funny thing, I HATE buttered popcorn. It smells like the greasy Taco Time I worked at in high school, and now that it's shut down I can freely admit without repercussions that the fryer grease was changed about as often as the bathrooms were cleaned. Of course, I also bought three 2-liters of holy water (aka. diet coke)which I fully intend to consume by the end of the night.

Yesterday, I swiped movies from my parent's house before we left for the evening, which brings me back to my opening statement. Knowing myself, the easiest choice for 5 hours of viewing pleasure would be every Jane Austen adaptation every created (which I could if I wanted, I do have them all). The thing is, I could do that on any day when I'm stuck in bed sick or on a rainy day. I've also held many a Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings (all the extended versions, 12 freaking hours later!) marathons, but those relate to my children who I am trying really hard to forget right now. Today is special, thus it deserves a special line up. So after much deliuberation (fanfare, pause fanfare),I started with "The Devil Wears Prada". Not the greatest movie, but since I've never seen it all the way through due to CONSTANT interruption from little people or annoying big people (yes, that means you Haime)I thought I'd give it a try. Turns out, it's not much better when you watch it all the way through. Meryl Streep is truly a magician though, because I LOVED her in Mama Mia and it's hard to believe the two characters are ultimately the same person. Also, the guy who plays Andy's boyfriend needs to pluck that mono brow. And shave. And bathe. I bet he smells all the time.

Next, I watched the 3rd movie in the X-Men series ( it really wasn't worth getting up to find the title), another movie I wasn't able to see all the way through at the theater. Okay, I feel like sometimes I am too negative as a person so I'll start with the good things, wait I mean thing- about this movie. Hugh Jackman. Purrrrrrrrrr. Oh my %$##, how does he get that buff? Seriously, his chest almost looks fake it's so perfect. Also, I finally noticed that little Juno is a newbie X-Men, sporting her pouty little pucker and sloucher "Life is Pain, so I don't want to be cute" attitude. It's really great that she went on to find role that didn't require her to stretch much as an actor. Now for the bad, or the other 60% of the movie when Hugh Jackman wasn't on screen. Yeah, everything else about it pretty much sucked. Despite this, I think I WILL look forward to the Wolverine movie, just for the eye candy. Frankly, they probably don't even need to have a plot or dialogue, just him, walking around, shirt off....................................................................oops, I think I just dozed off a little.

I was going to watch the Gidget series next, but I took one look at the cover and got really angry at just how badly the producers of these movies screwed up the series. Sandra Dee IS Gidget (okay, I'll give you that Sally Field was passable in the tv series), but that red haired THING that T.P.T.B. replaced her with in the Hawaii movie is so annoying I want to punch her in the ovaries for giving all women a bad name. (She was also in Disney's Summer Magic and about ruined that movie too) The only thing possibly worse than her is the other winner they cast in the Rome movie. At least there weren't many painfully fake surfing montages in it. Therefore, I chose instead to watch the Tammy series (you know, Tammy and the Bachelor, Tammy Tell Me True, Tammy and the Doctor,) mostly as a sign of support for their success in replacing the title character's actress after the first movie. Debbie Reynolds was great in the first movie, but Sandra Dee is just too cute. There is something slightly creepy about the obvious age difference between her and the leading men, but if the Heff can get away with it, anyone can.

So what do my movie choices say about me??? Well the "Devil" says I wish I were a size 2 and still cared about what I look like, but I'm not really into surviving on lemon water and I love my fleece sweats and hoodies too much to ever give them up. "X-Men" says I have a thing for bad boys who spend lots of time in the gym, but I wouldn't trade my wonderful and slightly bumpy husband for anything in the whole world. Besides, when we are all resurrected I WILL be a size 2 (I'll also have long, flowing blonde hair), and he WIll have the body of a greek god, right??? My issues with Gidget? I don't like posers. And finally, "Tammy" either touches the warmest, purest and simplest parts of my crusty old heart, or I have some deep rooted Oedipus issues that I need to work out with a counselor. Either way, it just makes for a perfect ending to a perfect afternoon of solitude.

Now, I wonder what my food choices say about me?...................