Wednesday, June 24, 2009

There's Something That I Need To Get Off My Chest.....

I've been feeling very guilty for the last few weeks because I have been living a lie. I can't live this way any more, sneaking around and going out under the cover of darkness. It's time I lay my sins before the world.

I fell off the McDonalds wagon.

After condemning McDonalds for their unfair persecution against extra-large beverages and the gluttonous consumers who need at least 42 ounces of soda to quench their thirst, I caved in and bought a large drink.

Okay, maybe I've bought 4 or 5 large drinks.

Fine, it's really more like a dozen but I feel bad enough already!

I felt like a druggie every time I went through the drive through to get my fix. I swear they must put something illegal in their syrup to make it so irresistible.

But tonight was the last time. I'm back on the path of rehabilitation. It's just that I had a monstrous headache and a McDonald's Diet Coke works better than Aleve or Tylenol at clearing it up. I can sense the moment it hits my blood stream and the vessels start widening. They cry out to me, "oh, thank you mamma. That's the good stuff".

But no more! I am done. I will not sell my soul for another $1 (the large is on sale for a buck right now. Sheesh, if it wasn't hard enough to abstain!). Thou art my Achilles heel, and I eschew you, and your perfect formula of carbonated water, caramel color and aspartame, to the end of time.

My name is Loma, and I am a McDonald's Diet Coke addict. I've been sober for 30 minutes...


  1. girl...just go get yourself a DC from McD! no one will judge you....well, at least I won't. love ya!

  2. Thanks woman! You are a great rhymer!